Pinch Me is about being delusional, just like everything else I write, except the subject requested a poem. And I can't tell if he knew I was feeling him, which would make a lot of sense, or if I'm just a goofy goober that likes to do things for the content.
When I develop a crush on someone, it’s very unhealthy and almost obsessive. Not intentionally, they just start consuming my brain and my dreams and my writing. This was one of those times. You see, I met this group of people while out with a friend, but this one guy stood out to me. All he did was smile and my brain was able to take that and run with it.
THE POEM
I must be dreaming because the only time we speak is when I'm fast asleep And even then, I fumble around for my words, overwhelmed by your beauty Nervous when you’re in close proximity, you stare as if you see straight through me I knew that I was gonna fall the moment I laid eyes on you Further confirmed by being in your presence Something so alluring about your essence And how you carry yourself, well-spoken and funny as hell I can still tell you exactly when we first met Day drinking in the park and yet Everything but you melted away Will never forget how you made me feel comfortable and safe Creating a perception of you with no real base Only our quick interactions and your pretty face But the world of what-ifs isn't real nor do they materialize They’re built over time, otherwise you’d be the man of my dreams Carefully crafted sun, moon, and skies In a world where I could love him completely Picture perfect with that gorgeous smile Making you mine is the only plot I’m tryna scheme Holding on to a mere fantasy more than the actual memory How delusional can I truly be Tensing up at the idea of you Knowing you make my heart skip a beat Because I can’t let myself get too comfy Though I would love to get closer to you I’ll move away out of fear of rejection Because I never seem to learn my lesson Purposefully missing a connection Hopefully I won’t come to regret it
August 2024 - what I told him the poem was about
October 2024
I tried to ignore this attraction because new friends are always a cute lil vibe but when him and I were talking everything literally melted away like I was in a movie. And I promise you I'm not exaggerating, I remember in the moment thinking this is some movie level stuff and getting so lost in my own thoughts that I forgot to listen to what he was saying. I just knew in my head that I was listening to this perfect stranger talk about his dreams and goals like Jhene Aiko in that one red carpet interview.
The crush, which are just lacks of information and he is still an enigma, ran its course, with this entire conversation acting as a closure moment. Anyways, that’s the story about that! Who knows, he might make a guest appearance later down the line. The question is would I tell y’all that it’s him, probably not but we’ll cross that bridge if and when we get there. For now, I love my silly little life and the silly little decisions I make!
THE PROMPTS
With all of this lovely reflection, I will leave you with some prompts to get your creative juices flowing:
What-Ifs: Create a poem centered on the idea of "what could have been," focusing on the emotions tied to imagining an alternate version of a relationship or situation.
Fear of Rejection: Write about a time when fear of rejection held you back from pursuing something you wanted. What emotions came up, and how did you deal with them?
The Power of What-If: Think about a "what-if" moment in your life that still lingers in your mind. How has holding onto this fantasy shaped your actions or feelings?
A Fantasy vs. Reality: Reflect on a time when you built up an idea of someone in your head. How did this perception differ from reality? What did you learn from the experience?
As always, take what resonates and leave what doesn’t!
With love, always
Natasha K
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